Tuesday, May 20, 2008


What defines strength? Physically, the signs of strength can be obvious; bulging biceps or killer abs. But what about mental strength? dictionary.com (yes i actually looked it up) defines it in many ways. One way being "moral power, firmness, or courage." That's not something you can see at first glance. I believe strength from within is shown in how disciplined a person is or how much control you have. My definition can be easily opposed as you go deeper into what gives a person strength. Is it holding back tears? or letting them out? walking away from a relationship? or giving it a chance? what about admitting your faults? does the fact that I can't make myself sit down and do homework make me weak? maybe ha but discussing my weaknesses is not the direction I want to go. Many would say someone who cries often is weak; however, how else are those feelings of grief/disappointment/pain supposed to come out? Perhaps through a blog? It is amazing how writing our feelings down can bring such a release to our soul (slightly corny i know). Better yet, it is amazing how writing our feelings can be much easier than saying them out loud. What sparked this post tonight was a friend's blog that finally told her father to step up and be a real man. Proud and disappointed are the feelings I got after this reading. Proud of my friend for not walking away from her father to try and mend a family. Proud of my friend being able to admit she cried and hurt. Proud of my friend for forgiving not one, but two men who had abandoned (one physically and one emotionally). Just proud of my friend for the journey she has made to the amazing woman she is today. And disappointed in the reaction from her father. Disappointed in his inconsideration, his inability to level with the only daughter who stuck by him, his cowardliness in letting another person control his actions towards and love for his daughter and pure disappointment in expecting an apology for his daughter speaking (or typing) her mind. With respect, you did take part in raising her, sir, to be the head strong person she is.

That blog, along with a collection of previously told stories, makes me even more grateful for the love and support of my family. It also, leaves me in disbelief to how someone can be so blind. The man cannot open his eyes to see the successful and godly woman his daughter has become. Instead of support and love, you fills her head with the idea that his actions are what someone who truly cares for her does. Which leaves the girl searching for support elsewhere and eventually creating a family of her own. I am glad to be a part of that family dollface. I pray you dad will read this and realize he is missing out on a wonderful person since he won't allow you home. Sorry to put your business out there. The feelings needed to come out... and what better way to release them then a blog, right?

With more love and support than you can handle,

1 comment:

Shelby-Jean said...

This literally brought tears to my eyes. Ughhh, I feel like all that you said is so untrue about me because of course we always think the worst of ourselves. I just want you to know it is a beautiful feeling to know you notice something I would never in me and you believe in me. I love you and thank you. You made me feel sooo special, because it can be a a low feeling especially around holiday season.

You said you had written something but didn't want anyone to read it I am glad you have come open with it. I love your writing style it keeps me entertained, I feel my writing is borrriiinnnggg, haha. <333 you!